Friday, January 9, 2009

Can Microsoft Fix Cure Relationship Marketing Virus

I recieved this story in an email today. I thought it was pretty
funny. So I thought I'd share with my readers.Hope you get a
good laugh out of it also

Dear Tech Support:

Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0. I soon
noticed that the new program began unexpected child processing
that took up a lot of space and valuable resources.

In addition, Wife 1.0 installed itself into all other programs and
now monitors all other system activities.

Applications such as Poker Night 10.3, Golf 5.0, Hunting and
Fishing 7.5, and Drinking 3.6 now runs very seldom or not at all.

I can't seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background while attempting
to run my favorite applications. I'm thinking about going back to
Girlfriend 7.0, but the uninstall doesn't work on Wife 1.0.

Please help!


Troubled User.

Tech Support Reply:

Dear Troubled User:

This is a very common problem that men complain about. Many
people upgrade from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0, thinking that it
is just a Utilities and Entertainment program.

Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM and is designed by its
Creator to run EVERYTHING!!! It is also impossible to delete
Wife 1.0 and to return to Girlfriend 7.0.

It is impossible to uninstall, or purge the program files from the
system once installed. You cannot go back to Girlfriend 7.0
because Wife 1.0 is designed to not allow this.

Look in your Wife 1.0 manual under Warnings-Alimony-
Child Support. I recommend that you keep Wife1.0 and work
on improving the situation.

I suggest installing the background application 'Yes Dear' to
alleviate software augmentation. The best course of action is
to enter the command C:\APOLOGIZE because ultimately you
will have to give the APOLOGIZE command before the system
will return to normal anyway.

Wife 1.0 is a great program, but it tends to be very high
maintenance. Wife 1.0 comes with several support programs,
such as Clean and Sweep 3.0, Cook It 1.5 and Do Bills 4.2.

However, be very careful how you use these programs.

Improper use will cause the system to launch the program
Nag Nag 9.5. Once this happens, the only way to improve the
performance of Wife 1.0 is to purchase additional software.

I recommend Flowers 2.1 and Diamonds 5.0


DO NOT, under any circumstances, install Secretary With Short
Skirt 3.3. This application is not supported by Wife 1.0 and will
cause irreversible damage to the operating system.

Best of luck,

Tech Support

If you feel your having trouble with your programming, my
suggestion would be to do a 30 Day Mental Cleanse. And learn
about the four personality types to alleviate the relationship

You can download the instruction manual to success in these
areas right here. "Success in 10 Steps"

Your Friend in Success

Gary McElwain
216-539-3553 Anytime
My Success Manual

Being a Mentor with a Servants Heart


Roxanne Green said...

Application 'Yes Dear' is my personal favorite application. Works well with wife 1.0 ;-)

Gary McElwain said...

I personally use the plug in
"Right Lorelle Your Always Right"
seems to keep system conflicts at a minimum. lol


Anonymous said...

thanks for the comment. U have a beautiful blog too.
Also include 'the secret' in your program. really amazing when it shows up the results.